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Quado: Addictions


from the May 2004 Star Beacon

by Carrie Hart

Q: If one decides to quit smoking, drinking and other addictive behaviors, how can one tap into the higher self to gain the necessary strength and fortitude not to give up? Are these behaviors really bad for the self, if now is all there is?

     Quado, do you have an answer to this question?

     Ah, yes, of course, of course.

     There are several questions here, and I would like to address the last one first. You need to understand better the concept of linear time in this lifetime, and why you are being told to focus in the moment, in now. First, know that what you do now does, of course, affect the future. You know this. It is obvious. If you eat too much food right now, then you will weigh more tomorrow. You have experienced this over and over. And if you expose your body to harmful substances now, you increase the odds of developing disease later. If you spend more money than you have now, then you will have debts to deal with tomorrow. Your actions do have consequences. Saying that you should focus on now does not eliminate this.

     Focusing on now is meant to point out to you where the power lies. For example, if you are eating too much or drinking too much because you are upset about something that someone did to you earlier in the day, then you are not focusing on now and empowering yourself now; you are focusing on the past and your anger or frustration that occurred in the past and using up your power of the current moment uselessly. The same is true for focusing in the future. If you are drinking now because you are worried about the debts which are piling up or concerned that you will not be able to find a job, then you are giving away now for a focus on fear of the future.

     The emphasis on now is so that you will understand that right now is the moment of choice. Right now is where the power lies to change your life, to affect your life, to improve your life and create it in a way you would like it to be. So right now, you need to stop, pause, breathe deeply and accept life as it is. Accept that yesterday you ate too much, drank too much, spent too much money and had an argument with your boyfriend. Accept this. It was as it was.

     But now, you have the power to make decisions, make choices, choose differently. Right now, you can choose not to have that cigarette, not to pour that drink, not to eat food that is bad for you. Right now, you can take your life into your hands and choose to do what is good for you. Right now, in this moment and in this moment only, you have control over what you do. You cannot control what you have already done. And you cannot control what might come toward you in the future. But you can control right now, this moment, and what you do, how you choose to respond to what comes your way, how you choose to act. Right now, you have complete power over your responses and complete responsibility for how you act.

     And this control and this responsibility, this choice, happens only now. So right now, choose to do what will create the life you wish to have. Right now, take full and complete responsibility for your actions. If you choose now not to have that drink and not to smoke that cigarette, then the next moment will flow out of this moment, and in the next moment, you will want it just a little bit less. And if you continue in this way, moment to moment, choosing how to respond to the cravings, choosing how to respond to the actions of others that irritate and anger and hurt you, choosing how to respond to the things which occur outside of your control, then the future will smooth out and flow with more grace.
Addictions have a very simple cure: Stop. It is not an easy cure, but it is a simple one. What you crave will gain strength with time you feed it.

     Think of an addiction as an ugly toad that lives inside you. If you feed it by giving it what it craves, then it gets bigger and bigger. It grows bigger and stronger and soon you cannot control it. Soon, it controls you. But if you starve it, if you refuse to give it what it wants, then it grows weaker each day.

     Yes, it will kick up a fuss. Yes, it will tell you that you cannot survive without what it craves, but it is not true. Starve it and it will grow weaker and smaller, so small after a time that you will hardly notice that it is there.

     But it is still here. Once you are addicted to something, you must realize that the toad still lives within you, even though it may now be very, very small. And any time you choose to feed it what it craves, it will again gain in size and strength. Once you are addicted, the only way to eliminate the battle completely and forever is to abstain forever. Otherwise, you will always be doing battle with this toad, with this craving inside you which wants to take over your life.

     And the choice not to feed the toad is yours and it exists in every moment. Right now, you have that choice. No, it is not about taking a vow not to do something in the future. It is about not doing it right now. It is not about how you tried and failed in the past. It is about succeeding right now.

     There is a mental set you need to have. Do not try. Do not attempt. Do not say, well, I’ll try really, really hard. Simply do it. Decide to take responsibility completely and fully. Realize that you are stronger than this toad and know that if you just exert control for a time, every moment of your life for an entire week, that the toad will be weaker at the end of that week. And if you then control your life for another week, he will be weaker still. And if you continue then for another month, for several months, for several years, he will be so small and weak that you will begin to be your old self again, the person you were before you handed your life over to this toad.

     You can do this. It is all about responsibility, discipline and making choices now, in the moment, right now. Not tomorrow. Right now. This is what is meant by focusing on the now. Because right now is where the power lies. Right now is the place and the only place where you can make that choice.

     It is very important that you not be a victim, that you not feel sorry for yourself. Feeling sorry for yourself makes you weaker and the toad stronger. It is not anyone else’s fault and it is not anyone else’s responsibility. The past is over and done. Things are the way they are. You have something to deal with and you are strong and capable and can do it. Forgive anyone in the past who contributed to the situation you are in now. Forgive and let it go. Forgive yourself for your own past weaknesses. Forgive and let go. Let the past go. All that exists is now. And right now, you are strong and capable; you are born anew in this moment with all of the strength you need to do what you need to do. Right now.

     Do this, and the future will flow out of this moment. It will flow out with pride and self-respect with a self-love which is shown by the actions you take, the choices you make. Take charge of your life, right now. Be proud of yourself. Use that strength you have in reserve. Decide to win. Decide to succeed. Do not fumble about hoping for strength and trying and failing. Do not struggle. Just do it and win.

     Winning is much easier than fighting. Succeeding is much easier than trying. Just being strong is much easier than beating yourself up because of your weakness. Be strong. You are strong. You have it within you to do what you need to do.

     So right now, not tomorrow but right now, choose to win. Choose to succeed. Choose to take back your life. Choose to defeat the toad within to whom you have given your power. Take it back. Take it back and declare yourself a victor. The moment you do this, you have won. Ignore his pleas for mercy. Reclaim your life. Enjoy watching him kick up a fuss. Know that it is the sign that you are winning. Just step back and watch him squirm and whine. You are strong. You are in charge. You control and own your life.

     You are the victor. End the struggle. Take charge and be the victor.

     You are this strong part of yourself. You are the presence that has the strength. Breathe deeply and feel this. Own this. Feel the strength of your own soul self inhabiting you. You are not this addiction. You are stronger than this. Own who you are. Love who you are. Show your love for yourself every moment of every day by doing what is best for you. You can do this. You can take this on and win.

     If you have a question you believe might interest other Quado readers, please e-mail it to carriehart@msn.com. Carrie Hart is the author of There is a Garden, the story of her spiritual journey from stressed executive to spiritualist and channeler of Quado. This book, Carrie’s CDs of original music, as well as daily messages by Quado are available on www.carriehart.com.

Copyright 2004 by Systematique, Inc.



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